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Penrod · 05-13-2009, 11:58 AM

http://tampa.craigslist.org/hil/bar/1168935282.html

My girlfriend and I broke up, and I had planned to surprise her with a 7-night Caribbean cruise departing on Sunday, June 21 (returning Sunday, June 28), leaving from Port of Tampa (this is a roundtrip cruise), on the Carnival Legend ship (the 4 1/2 stars one, not the crappy ship.) Ports of call: Tampa, Florida; Grand Cayman, Cayman Islands; Cozumel, Mexico; Belize City, Belize; Roatan, Honduras; Tampa, Florida.

I booked their top suite, on the Empress deck; per the brochure:
Suite with large private balcony
Square footage: 300 sq ft
Balcony square footage: 115 sq ft
Occupancy: Up to 2 guests (some sleep up to 4)
Amenities: Private balcony; floor-to-ceiling glass doors opening to balcony; separate dressing, sleeping, and sitting areas; sofa; two twin beds that convert to a king-size bed; private bathroom with double sinks, whirlpool tub, and shower; separate vanity area; hair dryer; refrigerator; minibar; TV with first-run movies; telephone; and wall safe

All meals are included, all you need is spending money for the ports of call. This cost me just over $4,800 (with tax) for two people, Cabin number: 6215. No refunds, so I'm stuck.

I was planning to ask her to marry me on this cruise. But we broke up, and she's back with her ex. I thought about just giving the cruise to them (karma and all), then said "f*ck it - screw her, I should get something out of this, right?" I don't really want to to go on the cruise - I mean, after all, the entire time it's going to suck because I'll be thinking about her.

So here's the deal. I'm willing to TRADE this, and all I want in return is a really hot woman who's willing to spend an evening with me. You know what I mean. (wink wink) I need something to help me get over her, and what better way to do it, right? My ex was drop-dead gorgeous. I mean, when she walked in a room, every guy's head turned. I figure for this cruise, there has to be at least ONE (maybe two?) really hot woman who's willing to help me get over her, right? A good grudge-f*ck, no names needed even. Just something to get me past the pain, and help me get over her.

All I ask is that she be between the ages of 18 and 25(ish), give or take a few years - I'll go older (as in mid-30s) if you have a REALLY smokin' body - and I don't care if you have a boyfriend, husband, or whatever. In fact, if you have a girlfriend that wants to go, I'd totally take two in trade (every man's fantasy, right?) Like every man, I love big boobs, a great ass, and high heels. Throw in schoolgirl outfit, and I'm in heaven. If you're submissive, we'll get along great.

About me: Mid-30. Not fat, just average. Been told I'm cute, even sexy. Don't really have any problems meeting women, but just have my heart broken, and can't bring myself to go hit the bars, because I'll probably run into her, and that would just ruin everything. It's tough moving on, especially when I thought she was "the one", but I was totally wrong.

Here's your chance to get an all-expense paid top-of-the-line cruise, and all you have to do is help me get over her. Seriously. Interested? Send some recent photos (doesn't have to be nude, but hey, that can't hurt, right?), and let's figure this out. Hey, if we hit it off, maybe we can go together. If not, bon voyage!

05-13-2009, 11:58 AM
Penrod Confirmed User Industry Role: Join Date: Aug 2001 Posts: 3,578	Best Craigslist Ad Ever ! ! ! http://tampa.craigslist.org/hil/bar/1168935282.html My girlfriend and I broke up, and I had planned to surprise her with a 7-night Caribbean cruise departing on Sunday, June 21 (returning Sunday, June 28), leaving from Port of Tampa (this is a roundtrip cruise), on the Carnival Legend ship (the 4 1/2 stars one, not the crappy ship.) Ports of call: Tampa, Florida; Grand Cayman, Cayman Islands; Cozumel, Mexico; Belize City, Belize; Roatan, Honduras; Tampa, Florida. I booked their top suite, on the Empress deck; per the brochure: Suite with large private balcony Square footage: 300 sq ft Balcony square footage: 115 sq ft Occupancy: Up to 2 guests (some sleep up to 4) Amenities: Private balcony; floor-to-ceiling glass doors opening to balcony; separate dressing, sleeping, and sitting areas; sofa; two twin beds that convert to a king-size bed; private bathroom with double sinks, whirlpool tub, and shower; separate vanity area; hair dryer; refrigerator; minibar; TV with first-run movies; telephone; and wall safe All meals are included, all you need is spending money for the ports of call. This cost me just over $4,800 (with tax) for two people, Cabin number: 6215. No refunds, so I'm stuck. I was planning to ask her to marry me on this cruise. But we broke up, and she's back with her ex. I thought about just giving the cruise to them (karma and all), then said "fck it - screw her, I should get something out of this, right?" I don't really want to to go on the cruise - I mean, after all, the entire time it's going to suck because I'll be thinking about her. So here's the deal. I'm willing to TRADE this, and all I want in return is a really hot woman who's willing to spend an evening with me. You know what I mean. (wink wink) I need something to help me get over her, and what better way to do it, right? My ex was drop-dead gorgeous. I mean, when she walked in a room, every guy's head turned. I figure for this cruise, there has to be at least ONE (maybe two?) really hot woman who's willing to help me get over her, right? A good grudge-fck, no names needed even. Just something to get me past the pain, and help me get over her. All I ask is that she be between the ages of 18 and 25(ish), give or take a few years - I'll go older (as in mid-30s) if you have a REALLY smokin' body - and I don't care if you have a boyfriend, husband, or whatever. In fact, if you have a girlfriend that wants to go, I'd totally take two in trade (every man's fantasy, right?) Like every man, I love big boobs, a great ass, and high heels. Throw in schoolgirl outfit, and I'm in heaven. If you're submissive, we'll get along great. About me: Mid-30. Not fat, just average. Been told I'm cute, even sexy. Don't really have any problems meeting women, but just have my heart broken, and can't bring myself to go hit the bars, because I'll probably run into her, and that would just ruin everything. It's tough moving on, especially when I thought she was "the one", but I was totally wrong. Here's your chance to get an all-expense paid top-of-the-line cruise, and all you have to do is help me get over her. Seriously. Interested? Send some recent photos (doesn't have to be nude, but hey, that can't hurt, right?), and let's figure this out. Hey, if we hit it off, maybe we can go together. If not, bon voyage!