Quote:
Originally Posted by Adnium_Ivana
I honestly don't know. I wrestle with this issue a lot as a woman; I thought I never wanted any kids but at 31 I also have a biological ticking clock so if I do change my mind - unlike men - I have another 10 years max to change my mind which is a scary thought.
Should I or shouldn't I?
I also can't tell if I don't want kids ever or if it's because I'm just not ready (both emotionally or mentally) yet. Again though, I don't have a lot of time left to be ready, so I don't know if I ever will be. I also feel like I haven't lived enough of my life or seen enough things and places in this world on my own before I'm saddled with a lifetime responsibility of raising children and let's face it, that often times extends well into their own adulthoods. Will I be a good parent? What if I'm neglectful? Worse yet, even if I give them all my love and attention and they STILL turn into the biggest pieces of shit will I in turn become bitter and resentful? I just don't want to have any regrets with my final decision.
TL;DR: I'm torn on the issue.
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You have way less than 10 years...trust me. My wife was in her late thirties and we had a tough time finding a solid egg for IVF. I know it can vary from female to female, but if your eggs are on the low spectrum of health/age ratio, you won't find out until later when it's too late. Some women have super eggs until they're 45, but that's rare. I would be getting worried at 35 if the egg quality is starting to decline. The thing is, there's no way you can know which end of the spectrum you'll fall on, no matter how healthy you think you are. Men's sperm is constantly regenerating, but your eggs are the ones you've had your entire life and they're aging with you.
I would suggest freezing some eggs TODAY if you think you may want to have kids later. I'm not even kidding. You can thank me in 10 years when you have a good, young, healthy egg to fertilize -- if you so choose to go down that path.
If not then you can always sell or donate it.
By the way, don't think about who you are now. You will be a different person in 7 to 10 years -- maybe worse or maybe better, but you'll be different.