I spoke to a gay guy I know years ago about the preferred terminology. "Gay" just seemed too - I don't know, abrupt - almost crude, while "homosexual" seemed more clinically accurate.
He told me that he preferred the term "gay" because "homosexual" includes "=sexual" which he felt was misleading because most gay people he knew were abstinent.
So, in summary, in the case of gay porn, I guess if you see 2 guys going at it, it would be OK to say "Hey, look at those homosexuals" but saying the same thing about 2 guys just having coffee together would be wholly inappropriate.
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