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Jackhammer Jesus?

I was re-reading Crooked Little Vein by Warren Ellis (well worth the read!), and at the back of the copy I have there are some interesting suggestion links. I visited this one and was amazed at what I found... (hotlinks below!)

Jackhammer Jesus
http://www.divine-interventions.com/...usFrontMed.jpg

Baby Jesus
http://www.divine-interventions.com/...yPurpleMed.jpg

Virgin Mary
http://www.divine-interventions.com/...ryFrontMed.jpg

and even Holy Water Lube!
http://www.divine-interventions.com/...erFrontMed.jpg

The descriptions are hilarious...

Holy Water Lube:
"Warding off dryness since 159 B.C.
Jesus wept but you don't have to.
Don't spend forty days and forty nights in the desert!
Bless your sweet pootang and dip that ass in the Water of LIFE!

Baptize that John and make it an upright Christian!
Hide the Pulpit with the speed of an Olympic luge!

Don't just give into temptation...Slide into it..and out of it..and into it."

Virgin Mary
"Hail Mary!

Virgin Mary like most smart women knows there is a Second Coming. And a Third. And a Fourth.

So give the Lucky Virgin what she wants!

"The Mother is.... Superior."

:1orglaugh :1orglaugh There's more at the site, including Buddha!! :upsidedow

This Account Has Been Suspended

yep great stuff, divine interventions has been around for a while but to my knowledge never did an affiliate program unfortunately.

ruth you have a typo on that bottom link should be
http://www.divine-interventions.com/

Bwhahaha awesome! Now go make a Muhammed Cum-covered-turban-Bomb :D

Quote:

Originally Posted by bm bradley (Post 18148100)

This Account Has Been Suspended

I messed up the bottom link, sorry!

It's http://www.divine-interventions.com

Quote:

Originally Posted by Caligari (Post 18148105)

ruth you have a typo on that bottom link should be
http://www.divine-interventions.com/

lol thanks, I saw and fixed it (Edit FTW!!) :thumbsup

this will make some people burn in hell :D :) if bible is truth

Oh suffering Catholics will rise and... do nothing, heh they never do. Want shit done, talk to the Muslims. Funny shit though :D

This Saturday... this Saturday...

Quote:

Originally Posted by bossku69 (Post 18148268)

This Saturday... this Saturday...

:1orglaugh :1orglaugh :1orglaugh

I gave my mother in law a baby jesus buttplug a couple of years ago for Christmas.
I think she regifted.

Looks like I have new gag gift material! Thanks:)

Quote:

Originally Posted by Shey (Post 18148190)

Oh suffering Catholics will rise and... do nothing, heh they never do. Want shit done, talk to the Muslims. Funny shit though :D

Christians can be crass too ...

http://thewhitebull.files.wordpress....clinicbomb.jpg

We actually have all of those in this house. The Baby Jesus butt plug comes out at Christmas.

They need a Facebook page so i can "Like" it.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sarah_MaxCash (Post 18149121)

We actually have all of those in this house. The Baby Jesus butt plug comes out at Christmas.

bahahahaha that's awesome Sarah

have you ever read Warren Ellis?

http://www.amazon.com/Crooked-Little.../dp/0060723939

Quote:

Crooked Little Vein
Michael McGill is a burned-out private detective who suddenly becomes enlisted by an army of presidential goons to retrieve the Constitution of the United States, but not the one we all know about. This would be the real Constitution (the one with invisible amendments) created by some of the Founding Fathers as a fallback for their great experiment. Along the way, McGill gains a polyamorous sidekick named Trix, gets scared to death by what men do with warm salty water, and descends into a world where crime, sex, and madness all seem to be the same thing.

Full of mind-bending style and packed with a wild cast of characters, Crooked Little Vein infuses Robert B. Parker with Kurt Vonnegut and the madness of the graphic-novel world. A surprisingly surreal treat, it will appeal to hardcore comic fans, mystery aficionados, and all readers looking for a riotous summer reading adventure.

Sample Chapter One of Crooked Little Vein

"Chapter One. I opened my eyes to see the rat taking a piss in my coffee mug. It was a huge brown bastard; had a body like a turd with legs and beady black eyes full of secret rat knowledge."

Crooked Little Vein puts you right in the gutter from the first sentence and doesn't let up. Sample the goods with a look at the complete first chapter, and see if you don't get hooked.

The Godzilla bukkake scene is just incredible :1orglaugh