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-   -   You know you have been in porn to long when... (https://gfy.com/showthread.php?t=905688)

kane 05-17-2009 01:21 AM

You know you have been in porn to long when...
 
I was watching the Mariners play the Red Sox this afternoon. I'm in the other room making a sandwich and I hear the announcers say, "Beltre over to Lopez and back to Branyan in time to get the double play. This is the second time tonight Beltre has started a DP."

And the first thing that pops into my head when I head DP is "double penetration"

I guess it isn't your average baseball game.

woj 05-17-2009 08:06 AM

:1orglaugh

MediaGuy 05-17-2009 08:10 AM

Then there's when the chick on the phone tells you she's giving herself a facial.

How the fuck?

:D

Kristian 05-17-2009 08:59 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MediaGuy (Post 15861539)
Then there's when the chick on the phone tells you she's giving herself a facial.

How the fuck?

:D

oh fuck i loled :1orglaugh:1orglaugh:1orglaugh

kane 05-17-2009 11:25 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MediaGuy (Post 15861539)
Then there's when the chick on the phone tells you she's giving herself a facial.

How the fuck?

:D

LOL

I also like it when people refer to booze as "adult beverages." I immediately wonder if they are naked.

papagmp 05-18-2009 12:52 AM

When someone texts you that they're tied up ATM and you picture a bondage ass-to-mouth scene.

cam_girls 05-18-2009 01:46 AM

I went to a bookstore and there was a section WATERSPORTS and I'm thinking WTF?

CurrentlySober 05-18-2009 02:21 AM

When you spend all day typing 'I like Poo...' on an adult webmaster board?

voa 05-18-2009 02:24 AM

haha yes you are right :D

CunningStunt 05-18-2009 02:59 AM

I can't spell milk anymore without getting it wrong.

Bossman 05-18-2009 03:02 AM

When you start to notice the interior decorating in porn movies :Oh crap

seeandsee 05-18-2009 03:56 AM

you need a break :)

CarlosTheGaucho 05-18-2009 03:59 AM

Yeah, I saw a hairdresser and cosmetics saloon in NYC and they had there in huge writing something like
"FREE FACIALS every saturday!"

At first I thought it's Juicy's joint.

LOL

pornguy 05-18-2009 06:28 AM

When checking out a woman IN CLOTHES is hot.

michel 05-18-2009 06:41 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MediaGuy (Post 15861539)
Then there's when the chick on the phone tells you she's giving herself a facial.

How the fuck?

:D

they squirt these days :winkwink:

StaceyJo 05-18-2009 06:54 AM

:1orglaugh

Nice one.

Sarah_Jayne 05-18-2009 07:39 AM

When you see grannies and think 'hey, I could sell you'.

Cyandin 05-18-2009 07:46 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sarah_MaxCash (Post 15863943)
When you see grannies and think 'hey, I could sell you'.

:1orglaugh:1orglaugh Very nice!

Sosa 05-18-2009 07:53 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by pornguy (Post 15863812)
When checking out a woman IN CLOTHES is hot.

Same here :thumbsup

MrHits 05-18-2009 08:06 AM

I was walking through borders looking for a Cisco networking book when I saw another book that said:

"Her first PIMP"

I was... WTF, then I read it again and it said:

"Head first PMP"

:-( its been a long 12.5 years...

MrHits 05-18-2009 08:07 AM

Ohh... And I'll never look at an ATM machine the same way again.

AsianDivaGirlsWebDude 05-18-2009 08:16 AM

You know you have been in porn to long when...
 
...you are getting a 15 minute lap dance from a hottie who is grinding her tushy into your crotch, while watching Game 7 of the NBA Playoffs, and you get more excited when a player "drains one from downtown."

True story from yesterday... :1orglaugh :pimp

ADG

Mrs F.U.B.A.R. 05-18-2009 08:25 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by cam_girls (Post 15863411)
I went to a bookstore and there was a section WATERSPORTS and I'm thinking WTF?

I suppose it would depend on what type of bookstore it was :upsidedow

Iron Fist 05-18-2009 08:29 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by pornguy (Post 15863812)
When checking out a woman IN CLOTHES is hot.

BINGO.... seriously! :2 cents:

GatorB 05-18-2009 08:29 AM

These make me smile when I see them on the shelf.

http://www.littledebbie.com/images/products/oat1.gif

HookUPcom 05-18-2009 09:19 AM

great thread.
Yes, all alive and corrupt in my head.
.

MaDalton 05-18-2009 09:47 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by GatorB (Post 15864049)
These make me smile when I see them on the shelf.

http://www.littledebbie.com/images/products/oat1.gif

lol

ATM and DP gets me all the time too

Tom_PM 05-18-2009 10:00 AM

"You know you have been in porn to long when... "
... you can remember a thread like this from maybe 8 years ago, then 5years ago, then a couple of years ago. :1orglaugh

;)

Mrs F.U.B.A.R. 05-18-2009 10:08 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MediaGuy (Post 15861539)
Then there's when the chick on the phone tells you she's giving herself a facial.

How the fuck?

:D

those darn Trannies :1orglaugh

JenniDahling 05-18-2009 10:13 AM

This thread is awesome and so very true.

MediaGuy 05-18-2009 11:26 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bossman (Post 15863521)
When you start to notice the interior decorating in porn movies :Oh crap

Guilty.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sarah_MaxCash (Post 15863943)
When you see grannies and think 'hey, I could sell you'.

Guilty.

Actually I tend to do this with a lot of women who are "innocent bystanders" and not in the biz... just because they aren't lol. "If she only knew how much $$$ she's worth..." lol

The "watersports" thing is bad too. I remember a dad talking about his son's aqua sports abilities and just ... smiling at him. If he only knew what his words were twisting into in my head. He'd have punched me.

:D

Persius 05-18-2009 11:39 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by GatorB (Post 15864049)
These make me smile when I see them on the shelf.

http://www.littledebbie.com/images/products/oat1.gif

:1orglaugh:1orglaugh:1orglaugh

Sly 05-18-2009 11:46 AM

Whenever I see or hear ATM I laugh... I can't help it.

Vicious_B 05-18-2009 12:06 PM

I swear people keep saying blow job in random conversations. Also now when I say "she should suck dick for a living" I mean it.

tranza 05-18-2009 12:28 PM

That's for sure man...I think you are right! haahaha

96ukssob 05-18-2009 12:29 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sly (Post 15864645)
Whenever I see or hear ATM I laugh... I can't help it.

:1orglaugh:1orglaugh

papagmp 05-18-2009 03:02 PM

When you can tell what country a video was shot in by the electrical plugs on the wall.

Marcus Aurelius 05-18-2009 03:07 PM

I'm guilty of the "clothed women" syndrome as well.

PantieZ 05-18-2009 03:13 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by pornguy (Post 15863812)
When checking out a woman IN CLOTHES is hot.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sosa (Post 15863970)
Same here :thumbsup

Quote:

Originally Posted by sharphead (Post 15864048)
BINGO.... seriously! :2 cents:

and i thought i am the only one .... duh :thumbsup

MaDalton 05-18-2009 03:17 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by papagmp (Post 15865328)
When you can tell what country a video was shot in by the electrical plugs on the wall.

ahahahaa - yeah. and when you know it's from Russia cause the carpet is on the wall and not on the floor - lol

V_RocKs 05-18-2009 03:33 PM

I have been around new groups of people that assumed I was gay because I didn't go gaga over some naked boobs being flashed on the dance floor...

In my mind I am usually thinking, those tits suck. I have seen much better... I wonder if I should suggest a good plastic surgeon.

GatorB 05-18-2009 03:39 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by papagmp (Post 15865328)
When you can tell what country a video was shot in by the electrical plugs on the wall.

When you can tell who a star is by their pussy.

Big Red Machine 05-18-2009 05:36 PM

Great thread

PersianKitty 05-18-2009 05:49 PM

You know you've been in porn too long when you see a billboard that says

"Moving at lightspeed"


and your first thought is

"When did Steve start advertising on billboards?"

Sarah_Jayne 05-19-2009 04:48 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MediaGuy (Post 15864578)
Guilty.



Guilty.

Actually I tend to do this with a lot of women who are "innocent bystanders" and not in the biz... just because they aren't lol. "If she only knew how much $$$ she's worth..." lol

The "watersports" thing is bad too. I remember a dad talking about his son's aqua sports abilities and just ... smiling at him. If he only knew what his words were twisting into in my head. He'd have punched me.

:D

When I was first getting into the industry, I was still working as a travel agent. When I sold package vacations to Mexico they brochures always said 'price includes water sports'. I always had a hard time not laughing.

bizarrejan 05-19-2009 04:50 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bossman (Post 15863521)
When you start to notice the interior decorating in porn movies :Oh crap

know the feeling lol

Bossman 05-19-2009 08:17 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by bizarrejan (Post 15866772)
know the feeling lol

For those that suffer with us... 70s Danish Interior Design Porno Style :winkwink:

http://musselsoppansvanner.blogspot....rno-style.html

Vicious_B 05-19-2009 08:35 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bossman (Post 15867271)
For those that suffer with us... 70s Danish Interior Design Porno Style :winkwink:

http://musselsoppansvanner.blogspot....rno-style.html

This is a slightly disturbing expression

http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_m0YtPN5vgm.../907991574.jpg

Mrs F.U.B.A.R. 05-19-2009 09:07 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by PersianKitty (Post 15865826)
You know you've been in porn too long when you see a billboard that says

"Moving at lightspeed"


and your first thought is

"When did Steve start advertising on billboards?"

wait.... Steve's not using billboards??? :1orglaugh

Hazlewood 05-19-2009 09:17 AM

or when you are with your friends and the porn topic comes up, everybody including their wives or girlfriends immediately look at you. All you can do is grin. lol


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