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Old 03-26-2024, 05:31 PM   #1
Huggles
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Anyone here tan regularly?

Hey yo!!!

So the little rural valley I live in has so little rainfall and while it is raining in communities nearby, this little valley is nice and sunny! Also, I have a patio that perfectly faces west, so in the afternoon I can get an amazing blast of that sweet, sweet cancer ray.

Back when I used to make the most money, I would tan all the time. Tanning does give me an energy boost, so I've been thinking about tanning again, but I'm totally out of the loop on lotions and shit people are using to track their tanning, enhance it, or whatever.

Any tips to be a bronze Canadian tan-god this season?

I'm looking for a nice deep orange like Trump, so when I post my photos, 2MuchCucked gets mad!

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Old 03-26-2024, 06:08 PM   #2
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Old 03-26-2024, 06:21 PM   #3
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Just go to any tanning salon and ask for their recommendation. Jot down the name of whatever they want to sell you and buy it cheaper on Amazon.
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Old 03-26-2024, 07:12 PM   #4
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Just go to any tanning salon and ask for their recommendation. Jot down the name of whatever they want to sell you and buy it cheaper on Amazon.
I want it now!

You're right though, good idea, last time I went tanning I did the same thing. The $70 lotion at the salon was like $15 on Amazon in a 3-pack! That was awhile ago. That shit actually sucked though, because it was so fucking greasy. You could shower and still be coated in it. Felt like a complete greaseball for days. I need some shit that will get me Jamaican dark with the least amount of tanning required.

I just want the best shit to get bronze with the least tanning and least maintenance. You know, some reaaaalllll brown marinade. None of the salons want to help, because, of course, they want you to need the most maintenance possible.

I need to get dark!
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Old 03-26-2024, 07:52 PM   #5
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I need to get dark!
Dark lives matter hehe

But seriously, stay away from tanning beds. It's cancer in a box. The new spray-on tans aren't as orange as they used to be and can tide you over until summer. But even going out in the sun wear a sun tan lotion of 30 or higher.

Okay mothering over. But I want a tan myself otherwise I look like Casper the (not so) friendly ghost.
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Old 03-26-2024, 08:02 PM   #6
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back in Canada I used to use a lotion called Bronze something. brown bottle, gold letters. I bought it at Shoppers Drug Mart (if it's still around). I remember that much

worked really well and smelled awesome but didn't like the uneven layer it often created. wasn't about to stand upright in crucifixion-mode for half an hour til it dried. and heaven forbid you smiled too much during drying and would end up with weird lines


I never needed self-tanner after I moved out of Canada until I had a surgery and went on a life-long med that drastically increases the risk of melanoma. first time in my life I gotta wear sunscreen, and the palest I have EVER been in my life

it's like I'm wearing a raincoat shielding me from the sun. blech

have been looking into this too, locally as import fees are insane. but no one carries it, unshockingly

my walls are beige and I'm starting to blend in. your politics suck but feel your pain


you're in Canada so amazon shipping fees should be negligible. or call around to local pharmacies, someone in your vicinty will carry it
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Old 03-26-2024, 09:18 PM   #7
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The new spray-on tans
I really want to rock a Trump orange this year. In silent support of Trump, even if I think both sides are totally fake anyways.
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Old 03-26-2024, 09:20 PM   #8
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100% going for this shade of orange. I hope it doesn't cost more than $200 to get a nice shade of Trump freedom orange in Canada.
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Old 03-26-2024, 09:24 PM   #9
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Where can I read on spray tans?

I actually like sun bathing. Like laying in the sun for an hour a day, 30 mins each side, with some lotion and headphones on.

I can get SO supercharged mentally and physically like this. Looking forward to this like crazy.

Gonna try Jesse's lotion recommendations. The shitty part about tanning is if you use the wrong lotion you'll feel like a fucking greaseball even after a shower, and some lotions attract bugs like crazy. I was stung multiple times and attacked by gross beetles last time I wore a lotion and tanned in my backward. Fucking shit man, fuck that! Fuck bugs yo, nothing more gross than nature with its little bug drones swarming you like with that buzzzzzzz. Buzzzz. Buzzzz. I watched so many Ukraine / Russian war videos with their drones killing people on full volume with the drone buzz, and when I tan, I hear that buzz in my ear and I flashback to all of the brutal drone execution videos I've seen, bodies blown apart, I don't see Ukrainians or Russians, I just see people, and the murder is so horrific, so sick man.

Wow tanning is gonna be fun this year!

I'm gonna claim Blackness.
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Old 03-27-2024, 11:07 AM   #10
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Skin cancer.

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Old 03-27-2024, 11:34 AM   #11
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i cunt a4d2 tan regularly...
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Old 03-27-2024, 12:21 PM   #12
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I'm gonna claim Blackness.
Yo mamma!
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Old 03-27-2024, 12:24 PM   #13
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Yo mamma!
. . .
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Old 03-27-2024, 09:40 PM   #14
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100% going for this shade of orange. I hope it doesn't cost more than $200 to get a nice shade of Trump freedom orange in Canada.
This color and look would suit you. Buy yourself some extra, from me.
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Old 03-27-2024, 10:57 PM   #15
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wear a sun tan lotion of 30 or higher.
30 in the winter, 50 in the summer. Fuck aging.
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Old Yesterday, 08:19 AM   #16
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. . .

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Old Yesterday, 08:23 AM   #17
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I wouldn't admit publicly that i do that. #fear
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Old Yesterday, 08:24 AM   #18
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With shapes like that, it's not ugly
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Old Yesterday, 11:57 PM   #19
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Sun radiation is very bad for your skin. Try to avoid it between 10AM and 5PM during the summer. And specially if you are Caucasic or White, and even worse if you are Redhead like Chucky.
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