I don't want to sound like a queer or nothing but i love you too man...

I think unicorns are really cool.

(looking forward to seeing you up seattle way - laurie reminded me today that we need to send a Hug Nation donation... will get that out tomorrow!)

11. How do you know Richard Dreyfuss?

Simply met him the night he came to watch us make porn. Incidentally, he played a porn director one time in a movie. The first person to name that movie in this thread will get... their choice... $25 bucks cash or a year pass to the HGV site... which we get almost forty bucks a month for and has many, many members that have been with us for years...:winkwink::2 cents::thumbsup

Inserts!

http://www.mgm.com/mgm/images/box-dv...x_full_dvd.jpg

ADG

Ladies and Gentlemen... WE HAVE A WINNER!

(but could you have done it with out the internet? or is that like asking if bonds could have done it without the steroids? in your case... nope... you probably didn't need the net)

I actually met Richard Dreyfuss once as well. It was at a COMDEX show in Las Vegas (for those of you who don't know what COMDEX is, it was the largest computer industry tradeshow in the world at the time).

Dreyfuss it turns out was a big computer geek, and I was the National Sales Manager for a computer company in Silicon Valley that created custom computers for the government and various industries (we're talking quad-processors, back in 1998!).

We talked for nearly 20 minutes. I was struck by how knowledgeable he was, and also how short he was. He is reportedly 5' 5', but that must be by NFL/NBA measurement standards.

Cool guy though, with a great sense of humor... :thumbsup

ADG

Who'da thunk eh? I love Farrell's stories... I've heard most of them and I still can't wait to read more... (Even I am learning in this thread!)

(Let's see if you still say that after you have to listen to them as many times as Lincoln or Stefanie)

Loving this stories hehehehe It's definitely one of the most entertaining, porn-history-with-a-twist learning experience!! Continue!!

I need more ASS LICKING! Goddammit GIVE ME MORE ASS LICKING!

I suppose after a while it's like listening to grandfather tell the same story he told you 100,000 times when you were a kid to YOUR little kid, smiling and rolling your eyes as you mouth it word for word... ;)

12. Do you know everyone in Hollywood?

I don't know everyone or anyone really. I just know that of the ones I have met most were about as impressive to me as stewed turnips. I am impressed by people like my friend Mike who despite being a multi platinum, grammy winning, half a dozen albums listed as best of all time record producer is still humble and gracious to anyone and everyone he meets regardless of their place in the world or the people they know.

I am really looking forward to reading this. Far-L you are an interesting person and funny as hell to be around man. :thumbsup

I have to say Mike is probably one of the most laid back guys I've ever met. He is SO unassuming you would never know how successful he is unless someone told you. He is so totally genuine and fun.

umm i know there is a structure to this ambush thing but perhaps you could share your story/experience on shooting porn on a public beach.. one of my alltime favorites..

Ah a Farrell thread....after working for him for 11 years I have some stories...just need to pick the best (or the worst?) Hee.

Ok first let me tell you about my first day- I was 22 and fresh off the bus from Michigan, I answer an ad in the paper for a 'video sales person". Yeah. So it's porn. A little freaked out, but I need to start bringing in some income so I take it.

I had never seen a porn before (shut up) so my new boss suggests I take home our new releases, check them out and get an idea of what we do so that I can sell them better.

So I go home, pop in one of the tapes. This lady is all naked and feeling herself up...ok, so far so good..then this face appears in the lower corner, like a shark coming up to eat her pussy....and the face is familiar....GOOD FUCKING LORD ITS MY NEW BOSS! Waaa-waaa. I popped that tape out so fast and didn't watch any of the others, just in case.

Yeah, Homegrown orientation forgot to mention that the President was also a performer....

:1orglaugh :1orglaugh :1orglaugh

You owe me half a cup of coffee! I laughed so friggin' hard I spilled my morning motivator...

Well written! :thumbsup

ADG

Where the hell is Lincoln?

If anyone has embarrassing Farrell pictures to post, it would be him. yay Stef posted!

I'm not sure if you ever heard about my first encounter with Farrell..

It was at last year's Florida Internext, and I had been ordered by my doctor not to travel. Being stubborn as I am I decided to make the trip anyway as I'd really wanted to get a chance to meet the crew my wife had been working for, for over a year already.

So, I arrive in Florida, in a lot of pain and discomfort so I decide to go to my room and sleep for awhile. When I wake up, I medicate myself properly on the painkillers my doctor had provided and wandered down the hall to the Homegrown party (High as a friggin kite on percocets). Farrell welcomes me at the door, and he's talking a million miles a minute. "Hey there! Glad you could make it! We've been so eager to meet you! Can I get you anything? Can I get you a drink? How about something to eat? Would you like a blowjob? How about a blowjob? *turns to Seska* Seska, give him a blowjob!" *stunned look* Seska replies "Uh, we haven't even met yet?" to which Farrell replies "Oh, well then I'll just give you a blowjob myself!"

I'm not sure what the look on my face was, but I know I was thinking "WHAT THE FUCK DID I JUST GET MYSELF INTO?". LOL. I'll never forget that day, Farrell definitely left an impression to say the least.

*Edit: DAMNIT, she logged in without me noticing. Posted by JACT. :(

I don't have any such Ferrel stories, but I will tell you that I keep "Mr. Fun" on my desktop for whenever I get frustrated and need a good laugh.

You and me both! Mr fun's mondo adventure is the best! It's Farrell, playing himself in a porno. (he is so like that in real life too)

Ok, anyone know that show, "Trailer Park Boys"?

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v2...orikd6891m.jpg

What is up with this pic I found one day at work? Dude looks like Julian! Stef?

Thank you, somehow talking about Farrell brings out the humorist in me.

I have the funniest photos of him, give me a few and I'll post. Hee when he gets back he'll see his thread turned into a roast!

Ohhh the stories. Muhahaa

Pics are on the way. I have so many....................shit.

This is an awesome ambush!! Really enjoying reading all your answers :)

Brad

13. Have you ever humped a statue while buck ass naked on camera?

Ok... before my wonderful employees who will probably all be sacked and rehired so I can sack them again before this thread is through tell any more stories about me I will segue into how I got captured on video humping a statue. Actually I think it was more than one.

After seeing me act in a couple of videos a guy named Tony Lovett (great guy who now works at AVN) decided he wanted to write a porn script featuring me as the main character and his hook for it was essentially to create a porn of "The Cat in the Hat" by Dr. Suess. I was to play the mischevious cat-like character "Mr. Fun".

The guy who was directing it saw right away what a good little content monkey I was and knew that whatever tune he played I would do the hully gully neat and quick. And that bastard had a pretty twisted mind. The shoot was mostly staged at some fancy house up at the top of Mulholland. The first clue I had that things were going to get pretty weird was when the director asked me to rub my dick over the home owner's silverware.

A few hours later I had to dance around a pool with my strange plaid pants around my ankles humping statues.

But I knew that I was really screwed when that pervert wanted me to go down on a starlet while some other guy did the watusi on her butthole.

"Um.... I am not exactly comfortable with that." I protested.

"We need it for the euro version." The director explained.

"I... I... ummm... I...don't... umm..."

"You want to get paid right?"

Two things happened that day. One I realized I am not gay but any double penetration scene with two guys and a girl is pretty frigging bi no matter how you slice it and I might as well accept that and get the fuck over it. Next I realized that it was way better to be the one telling people what to do in their porn scene than being a content monkey that has to do the dance when the organ starts to grind.

14. Have you ever handed gift bags at a party while buck ass naked acting like a gorilla?

No. I have not. Unless you have pictures to prove it then all you have is nada, zilch, zero on me.


Oh crap.

Well... I guess that picture was already posted so I might as well explain. (explain = make excuses)

When we throw our parties at the shows we really try hard to make them unique experiences that are fun and break the typical bunch of affiliate reps getting too drunk and staring at the too few women in the room type of party that have become an all too familiar staple of webmaster events.

That night we decided to do a treasure hunt which was pretty much a thank you nod to Treasure Hunt aka Lady Mischief, at that time one of the newest members of team Homegrown.

When everyone had come back from the crazed search - in which there were no rules other than win at all costs - and the party was just about done then I went into a back room and collected all the gift bags to hand out. Now I don't want to brag, but maybe someone that was there can say how sweet our gift bags tend to be... However, I knew that just going out and passing around satchels of goodies was not quite enough to really show our appreciation for folks coming by.

I new I had to bear my soul.

I had to strip myself of all pretensions.

I had to take off all my clothes and return to my simian self to truly demonstrate my humble thanks.

And so mr. Teabaggins was born.

I'm making this post on Stefanie's behalf since she has fewer then 30 posts...

Here are two beautiful Euro babes being very cool, and Farrell of course loses his:
http://www.homegrowngazette.com/farl/anitas.jpg

Yeah for some reason the Euros make him nuts, here he is being silly with another:
http://www.homegrowngazette.com/farl/illana.jpg

Maybe this was taken at a Halloween show, or maybe he just likes to dress like a lizard and play Godzilla with the ladies. You decide:
http://www.homegrowngazette.com/farl/lizard1asmall.jpg

Half hippie/Half grungy trucker after 12 days on the road:
http://www.homegrowngazette.com/farl/peace1asmall.jpg

Farrell is in his natural element (aka under a stripper):
http://www.homegrowngazette.com/farl...per1asmall.jpg

Young stud playing the title role in the Hitchhiker series (would you give him a "ride"?)
http://www.homegrowngazette.com/farl/thehitchhiker.jpg

And finally, he may never have done gay porn, but this photo is very Gay for Pay:
http://www.homegrowngazette.com/farl/stud1a.jpg

This thread is epic, and I love all the new pics! I can not wait to see what else the HG crew has in store for us :)

I'm posting this one for Lincoln!

http://www.homegrowngazette.com/farl/Mullman.jpg

I've been wondering where all my employees were all day, and then I realized they've all been glued to this thread. Damn you Sleazy! :)

Well turns out because I don't have enough GFY posts I can't post all my awesome evil pictures. Don't worry, Farrell, Jact is going to post them for me :)

So instead let me tell you all about one of my more unique jobs here at Homegrown.

When I first started, I was given the job of writing press releases and getting the word out on how awesome Homegrown is, since that is what I was going to college to do.

Well this company is a very easy sell to both adult and mainstream media, and soon we had a lot of great press opportunities.

Now we all know that Farrell is very social and charming and has no problem talking to anyone, especially about his favorite subject: Porn and why Homegrown Video rocks.

However, when it came to some of our bigger, more mainstream press opportunities such as programs on HBO or MTV, like all people, Farrell would get a bit nervous in his interviews, as of course he wanted them to go as great as possible. And of course, nerves and hot lights can lead to sweating.

Now, most people sweat from their hair line, or their upper lip, or their armpits. Superhuman Farrell does not have those average sweat glands, however. No, he has two, located in the middle of his forehead, one above each eyebrow where it arches.

And he doesn't get slightly moist, or dewy, or glisten like a morning rose, but those two little holes POUR water, with the kind of water pressure you hope and pray your hotel shower will have.

Of course during an interview discussing the business of porn, obvious signs of sweat will make someone think you are nervous with something to hide, or paint you as a shifty character.

I couldn't let Farrell, Mr Peace & Love Everyone is Beautiful Hippy, come off as anything less than his upstanding self so I rushed in with the papertowels to dab his brow. Then again. And Again. And yeah, again.

A good employee will go over and beyond, and obviously Farrell is very lucky to have me!

*And if any of you start calling me Sweat-Rag Stef I will shank you.

I think the head was photoshopped onto the body in that last pic. lol

ORGY FOR WORLD PEACE!!!


and SEX FOR LIFE TOO-

I just had to throw those names in there to see if I jar anymore memories for FAR-L

:-))

Gah, Farl just sweats all the time.

He suddenly started improvising a song and danced like a madman last time I hung out with him. Maybe he needs to get a physical and his thyroid checked.

Oh wait, no that's just him being himself.

And I agree with Jact, this thread is killing work production today. Plus I don't want Stef to shank me, so ima duck out.

edit: I cannot spell to save my life

I beg to differ that Mr Teabaggins was born that day...

If memory serves, a day or two before the party, I was very comfortably asleep in my bed only to be jarred awake by something moving the bed.. I woke up to Farrell, in his purest natural state with his balls mere inches from my forehead. Luckily, I was able to fight through the groggy morning lethargy and quickly pull the blankets over my head before I was a victim of this man, acting like an ape, teabagging me.

Thankfully he bounded off my bed and into the main room of the suite, where he vaulted over a couch and then a table, knocking a vase with his swaying nutsack. Monkeyboy was able to rescue the vase before it was broken, but it was a sight like nothing you have seen. All this time, making the noises of a monkey "ooh ooh ah ah AHH AHHHHHH" and doing the ape thing with his arms..

You're paying for my therapy, buster!!!!!!!!

This pic is sorta gay for pay too I have to say, but Farrell pulls it off well!

http://www.homegrowngazette.com/farl/bubblesfarrell.jpg

This kicks ass!

I got woke up the same way that morning. Much worse than the loudest alarm clock you have ever heard.