American Style Lawsuits - The Real Way to Wealth - GoFuckYourself.com

FTVGirls · 07-13-2003, 08:34 AM

We work hard to make our money, but it looks to me the easiest way is to make it via a lawsuit... a lottery-style reward with no work involved:

"It's time once again to consider the candidates for the annual Stella Awards. The Stella's are named after 81-year-old Stella Liebeck who spilled coffee on herself and successfully sued McDonalds. That case inspired the Stella Awards for the most uniquely successful lawsuits in the United States for last year. Actually, joint awards should be given to the plaintiff attorneys and the flaming idiots on the juries who awarded anything at all to these morons--who deserved NOTHING!!!! The following are this year's candidates:

///////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

Kathleen Robertson of Austin, Texas, was awarded $780,000 by a jury of her peers after breaking her ankle tripping over a toddler who was running inside a furniture store. The owners of the store were understandably surprised at the verdict, considering the misbehaving little toddler was Ms. Robertson's son.

//////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

A 19-year-old Carl Truman of Los Angeles won $74,000 and medical expenses when his neighbor ran over his hand with a Honda Accord. Mr. Truman apparently didn't notice there was someone at the wheel of the car when he was trying to steal his neighbor's hubcaps.

/////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

Terrence Dickson of Bristol, Pennsylvania, was leaving a house he had just finished robbing by way of the garage. He was not able to get the garage door to go up since the automatic door opener was malfunctioning. He couldn't reenter the house because the door connecting the house and garage locked when he pulled it shut. The family was on vacation, and Mr. Dickson found himself locked in the garage for eight days. He subsisted on a case of Pepsi he found, and a large bag of dry dog food. He sued the homeowner's insurance claiming the situation caused him undue mental anguish. The jury agreed to the tune of $500,000.

///////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

Jerry Williams of Little Rock, Arkansas, was awarded $14,000 and medical expenses after being bitten on the buttocks by his next door neighbor's beagle. The beagle was on a chain in its owner's fenced yard. The award was less than sought because the jury felt the dog might have been just a little provoked at the time by Mr. Williams who was shooting it repeatedly with a pellet gun.

//////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

A Philedelphia restaurant was ordered to pay Amber Carson of Lancaster, Pennsylvania, $113,500 after she slipped on a soft drink and broke her coccyx (tailbone). The beverage was on the floor because Ms. Carson had thrown it at her boyfriend 30 seconds earlier during an arguement.

/////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

Kara Walton of Claymont, Delaware, successfully sued the owner of a night club in a neighboring city when she fell from the bathroom window to the floor and knocked out her two front teeth. This occurred while Ms. Walton was trying to sneak through the window in the ladies room to avoid paying the $3.50 cover charge. She was awarded $12,000 and dental expenses.

///////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

Mr. Merv Grazinski of Oklahoma City, Oklahoma. Mr. Grazinski purchased a brand new 32-foot Winnebago motor home. On his first trip home, having driven onto the freeway, he set the cruise control at 70mph and calmly left the drivers seat to go into the back and make himself a cup of coffee. Not surprisingly, the RV left the freeway, crashed and overturned. Mr. Grazinski sued Winnebago for not advising him in the owner's manual that he couldn't actually do this. The jury awarded him $1,750,000 plus a new motor home. The company actually changed their manuals on the basis of this suit, just in case there were any other complete morons buying their recreation vehicles. "

-Since most of us run companies, consider being on the brunt end of a lawsuit, especially a cheezy one.

Jakke PNG · 07-13-2003, 08:36 AM

That's one thing that I HATE HATE HATE about US. The other thing I hate is delivered McD food, I want some too.

BRISK · 07-13-2003, 08:39 AM

http://www.stellaawards.com/bogus.html

http://www.snopes.com/legal/lawsuits.htm

Sausage · 07-13-2003, 08:43 AM

In one of my trips to the states I got talking with someone who owned 8 pizza restaraunts, and he has been sued about 80 times in the space of 2 or so years.

He mentioned something about when you are sued the law consideres you guilty until proven innoncent.

is that true over there? seems pretty fucked up.

rowan · 07-13-2003, 08:50 AM

I was chatting with someone the other day about buying a cheap block of land in the country 'just for the hell of it.' He mentioned that one of the hidden costs was public liability insurance. Yep, if some fucker climbs over the fence and trespasses on MY land, then steps on a rusty nail... I'm liable for it.

In Australia we're currently having a so-called "public liability crisis" ... people are becoming more quick to sue and insurance companies are raising premiums or refusing completely to insure certain operations. I heard recently about a children's horse riding camp having to close down because no one would insure him.

Sausage · 07-13-2003, 08:58 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by rowan
I was chatting with someone the other day about buying a cheap block of land in the country 'just for the hell of it.' He mentioned that one of the hidden costs was public liability insurance. Yep, if some fucker climbs over the fence and trespasses on MY land, then steps on a rusty nail... I'm liable for it.

In Australia we're currently having a so-called "public liability crisis" ... people are becoming more quick to sue and insurance companies are raising premiums or refusing completely to insure certain operations. I heard recently about a children's horse riding camp having to close down because no one would insure him.

Fuck yeah its out of control.

Our martial arts school of only 1000 or so saw an increase of 2,200% or so in 1 year for public liability insurance. A flower aranging club had to close down because of the insurance hike in the same hall as I teach. The disclaimers you gotta use nowdays are a joke.

seven · 07-13-2003, 09:05 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by BRISK
http://www.stellaawards.com/bogus.html
http://www.snopes.com/legal/lawsuits.htm

Haha.. it was already obvious those stories were producta of someone's wild imagination

rowan · 07-13-2003, 09:07 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by seven

Haha.. it was already obvious those stories were producta of someone's wild imagination

The real ones are just as interesting.

http://www.stellaawards.com/caselog.html

Stella Short: TV Show "60 Minutes" does segment on how a certain area of Mississippi has gone lawsuit crazy (e.g., Stella Awards #1). Two jurors who were never named in the broadcast take exception to the criticism and sue the show -- for $6 billion.

Biggy2 · 07-13-2003, 11:26 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Sausage
In one of my trips to the states I got talking with someone who owned 8 pizza restaraunts, and he has been sued about 80 times in the space of 2 or so years.

He mentioned something about when you are sued the law consideres you guilty until proven innoncent.

is that true over there? seems pretty fucked up.

its innocent until proven guilty, and thats only in criminal cases..

in the states, for a civil case, it takes a "preponderance of evidence" to win - the legal system is very weird..

it really comes down to who can lie the best, its pretty sad.

Sly_RJ · 07-13-2003, 11:39 AM

Our law suit epidemic is disgusting and makes me sick. Hate it when people are so damn lazy they think it's right to steal other peoples money just because of a loophole in the law.

It's terrible in California. Everyone I know has mentioned something about "slipping at Wal-Mart to collect damages". Disgusting.

xxxdesign-net · 07-13-2003, 11:59 AM

well, all those cases were probably appealed ... and lost! Or I would hope!

07-13-2003, 08:36 AM	#2
Jakke PNG ex-TeenGodFather Industry Role: Join Date: Nov 2001 Location: Suomi Finland Perkele Posts: 20,306	That's one thing that I HATE HATE HATE about US. The other thing I hate is delivered McD food, I want some too. __________________ ..and I'm off.

07-13-2003, 08:39 AM	#3
BRISK Too lazy to set a custom title Join Date: Feb 2003 Posts: 12,240	http://www.stellaawards.com/bogus.html http://www.snopes.com/legal/lawsuits.htm __________________ I post on GFY so that when people ask me what I do, I can tell them that I work with the mentally retarded.

07-13-2003, 08:43 AM	#4
Sausage Confirmed User Join Date: Oct 2002 Location: Australia Posts: 3,012	In one of my trips to the states I got talking with someone who owned 8 pizza restaraunts, and he has been sued about 80 times in the space of 2 or so years. He mentioned something about when you are sued the law consideres you guilty until proven innoncent. is that true over there? seems pretty fucked up. __________________ IW Skype : blance8888 Icq : 15567120

07-13-2003, 11:39 AM	#10
Sly_RJ Live Hard - Die Hard Join Date: Feb 2002 Location: Ready to leave... Posts: 17,042	Our law suit epidemic is disgusting and makes me sick. Hate it when people are so damn lazy they think it's right to steal other peoples money just because of a loophole in the law. It's terrible in California. Everyone I know has mentioned something about "slipping at Wal-Mart to collect damages". Disgusting. __________________ PHAT SERVERS - Quality dedicated hosting at a quality price! sly AT phatservers DOT com - 147479144

07-13-2003, 08:34 AM	#1
FTVGirls So Fucking Banned Join Date: Oct 2002 Location: Phoenix AZ Posts: 1,052	American Style Lawsuits - The Real Way to Wealth We work hard to make our money, but it looks to me the easiest way is to make it via a lawsuit... a lottery-style reward with no work involved: "It's time once again to consider the candidates for the annual Stella Awards. The Stella's are named after 81-year-old Stella Liebeck who spilled coffee on herself and successfully sued McDonalds. That case inspired the Stella Awards for the most uniquely successful lawsuits in the United States for last year. Actually, joint awards should be given to the plaintiff attorneys and the flaming idiots on the juries who awarded anything at all to these morons--who deserved NOTHING!!!! The following are this year's candidates: /////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////// Kathleen Robertson of Austin, Texas, was awarded $780,000 by a jury of her peers after breaking her ankle tripping over a toddler who was running inside a furniture store. The owners of the store were understandably surprised at the verdict, considering the misbehaving little toddler was Ms. Robertson's son. ////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////// A 19-year-old Carl Truman of Los Angeles won $74,000 and medical expenses when his neighbor ran over his hand with a Honda Accord. Mr. Truman apparently didn't notice there was someone at the wheel of the car when he was trying to steal his neighbor's hubcaps. ///////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////// Terrence Dickson of Bristol, Pennsylvania, was leaving a house he had just finished robbing by way of the garage. He was not able to get the garage door to go up since the automatic door opener was malfunctioning. He couldn't reenter the house because the door connecting the house and garage locked when he pulled it shut. The family was on vacation, and Mr. Dickson found himself locked in the garage for eight days. He subsisted on a case of Pepsi he found, and a large bag of dry dog food. He sued the homeowner's insurance claiming the situation caused him undue mental anguish. The jury agreed to the tune of $500,000. /////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////// Jerry Williams of Little Rock, Arkansas, was awarded $14,000 and medical expenses after being bitten on the buttocks by his next door neighbor's beagle. The beagle was on a chain in its owner's fenced yard. The award was less than sought because the jury felt the dog might have been just a little provoked at the time by Mr. Williams who was shooting it repeatedly with a pellet gun. ////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////// A Philedelphia restaurant was ordered to pay Amber Carson of Lancaster, Pennsylvania, $113,500 after she slipped on a soft drink and broke her coccyx (tailbone). The beverage was on the floor because Ms. Carson had thrown it at her boyfriend 30 seconds earlier during an arguement. ///////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////// Kara Walton of Claymont, Delaware, successfully sued the owner of a night club in a neighboring city when she fell from the bathroom window to the floor and knocked out her two front teeth. This occurred while Ms. Walton was trying to sneak through the window in the ladies room to avoid paying the $3.50 cover charge. She was awarded $12,000 and dental expenses. /////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////// Mr. Merv Grazinski of Oklahoma City, Oklahoma. Mr. Grazinski purchased a brand new 32-foot Winnebago motor home. On his first trip home, having driven onto the freeway, he set the cruise control at 70mph and calmly left the drivers seat to go into the back and make himself a cup of coffee. Not surprisingly, the RV left the freeway, crashed and overturned. Mr. Grazinski sued Winnebago for not advising him in the owner's manual that he couldn't actually do this. The jury awarded him $1,750,000 plus a new motor home. The company actually changed their manuals on the basis of this suit, just in case there were any other complete morons buying their recreation vehicles. " -Since most of us run companies, consider being on the brunt end of a lawsuit, especially a cheezy one.

07-13-2003, 08:50 AM	#5
rowan Too lazy to set a custom title Join Date: Mar 2002 Location: Australia Posts: 17,393	I was chatting with someone the other day about buying a cheap block of land in the country 'just for the hell of it.' He mentioned that one of the hidden costs was public liability insurance. Yep, if some fucker climbs over the fence and trespasses on MY land, then steps on a rusty nail... I'm liable for it. In Australia we're currently having a so-called "public liability crisis" ... people are becoming more quick to sue and insurance companies are raising premiums or refusing completely to insure certain operations. I heard recently about a children's horse riding camp having to close down because no one would insure him.

07-13-2003, 11:59 AM	#11
xxxdesign-net My hips don't lie Industry Role: Join Date: Nov 2002 Posts: 10,129	well, all those cases were probably appealed ... and lost! Or I would hope!