NikKay

WHY do men play with their video games every spare minute of every day? Are they just THAT one track minded? Do they really wake up and think, "Video Games Video Games Video Games Video Games!" and see nothing wrong with that?

Mind you, I know not ALL men do this and I know there also are women to whom this applies. I'm just generalizing (and personalizing) here.

At what point does it become an unhealthy obsession? At what point does it become immature? When does it go from being a means of entertainment to an impediment to everything else in your life? Is it a valid argument to state that if video games are the thing you most enjoy in life than you should be able to do so as often as you like without being frowned upon for it? As in, if one chooses video game playing over exercising or reading or visiting a museum or going hiking or spending time with loved ones; is that just their intrinsic right or is it something to be concerned with?

My argument against it is based on the belief that all things in life need balance to function at their best. A life whose main joy and daily thought is based on the current video game being played seems limited and sad to me. I would feel the same about an unhealthy obsession about work or exercising or sex or whatever else people get "addicted" to.

But is this just how I feel because I'm a girl and because I don't play?

Thoughts?!?!

96ukssob

sounds like your bf is ignoring you for video games

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Juicy D. Links

like you said it is a addiction per se , like anything else once addicted and habit formed it is hard too break ....

I havent played WoW now for over year and half maybe longer.... when I played i was playing all the time till i went cold turkey on it

candyflip

Have you tried lying down in front of the games...spread eagle and naked?

Try that. See what happens and report back.

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BillyHoe

games don't get bitchy every 28 days ;)

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Lord Voldemort

We play video games because we can't go out there and shoot, stab and kill real people when we're frustrated.

Scott McD

It's either that or have to listen to some bitch moaning, or take her shopping (again) for fucking shoes (again), or have to watch something shitty on tv with her because she likes it, or.................. something along those lines...

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Agent 488

find yourself a real man.

seeandsee

gogin to arrmor games right now

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Honez

I agree with you.

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alexchechs

I have curtailed my playing alot in the past 6 months. My ex used to play them way more than me. I think in the last month I have maybe played my PS3 a total of 4 hours compared to at least 3 hours a day before that...

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dav3

Competition matches can be pretty intense, like heart visibly pounding through your shirt intense. It's tons of fun, especially if you win.

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Choopa Phil

im about to hit up the gym after work, you're more than welcome to join me

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_Richard_

it's called attention jealousy

CDSmith

Wall of frustrated bitchy-text hits cdsmith for 10731 points of dammage.

cdsmith was killed.

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Agent 488

lose the zero and get with the hero.

fatfoo

So, I was thinking about the difference between men and women. Thinking about it obviously, man has a dick and woman has a pussy. But, I want to get more in depth about how the human brain varies from one gender to the other.

I am thinking that men and women have the same brain before puberty starts. After puberty begins - hormones change the brain function and genitals develop and other signs of maturity appear.

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BV

I'd rather play with your woolybooger. hahahaha

crockett

I can answer this with a question..

Why do woman always do everything possible to make men's life measurable and try to take away the few things they have left and enjoy. You should be happy he stays at home playing a video game, as he could be out at a bar.

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Agent 488

start sleeping with his friends. he'll take notice of you then.

ArsewithClass

Nothing wrong with any addiction as long as its not harming anyone.

woj

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NikKay

Oh boy. Look, if you want to spend the 6+ hours after you get home from work and 10+ hours a day on the weekends playing video games then don't get married and have a family. If I wanted to spend that much time doing one specific thing I would be kind enough to the people around me not to forge relationships that require maintenance. And seriously, it's as unattractive to watch a guy play video games all day as it is to watch a chick go shopping all day. I guess I could go spend all those hours at the mall instead of worrying about his attention to the "real" things in life but that's just not my style.

StuartD

Well, would you rather they drink all the time? Go out every night? sell drugs?
Remember, it could be worse.

That being said, I bet you're usually in front of the tv while he's at his video game... well, in this day and age, video games are like top budget hollywood releases except that YOU ARE IN IT... personally, as a guy, I much prefer COD to a new war movie, or Assassin's Creed 2 to a new American Ninja movie (I have no idea why I liked those movies).

So he could be parked in front of the tv watching a movie instead, and you'd feel better about that somehow because he'd be sitting next to you. Instead he's just interacting with his entertainment now rather than sit mindlessly next to you.

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Tom_PM

In my experience, cigars are most often cigars.

He probably simply finds it enjoyable.

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Agent 488

seems like he is running away from something. send him to a shrink.

Agent 488

he might as well be.

since he's just a lump on the couch and not there emotionally and his attention is gone not much difference except she can see his vacant face wasting away in thetv room.

_Richard_

some sort of new game he is playing? or is this constant every night or weekend?

NikKay

I'm mostly cooking, cleaning, hanging out with the children, reading, and working while he's playing video games. I don't like TV and I never got the feel for video games. I will take watching a movie with him on occasion but I prefer talking and going places together and conducting the nuisances of a household with children together and having friends over to most other (brainless) activities.

Sure, it could be worse. But I wouldn't just accept those things any more than I'm willing to just accept this one. Maybe you prefer a girl that will accept what she does not like and, of course, that's always an option as is simply remaining single so you can do all the things you want to do on your own time.

A few hours during the week and a few hours a day on the weekends are not a big deal. But 20+++ hours a week is terribly annoying and unattractive. Would you want to be married to a chick who watched that much reality TV every week? Or would you just shrug and say, "Well, at least she's not on drugs."

sobaka

Why would he be doing "exercising or reading or visiting a museum or going hiking or spending time with loved ones" if that is not what he wants to do? Sounds like he is happier doing things by himself, it's very common for men. Doing things with others is probably somewhat of a drag to him; nothing you will ever be able to do anything about, should have figured it out before getting involved with him if that is a problem for you.

NikKay

To be fair, it worsened with the release of this new game. But it has always been a bit of an issue. I think top priorities should be your career, family, friends, and self-improvement. Everything outside of that realm should be enjoyed, for sure, but not at the detriment of the top 4 things. I like to go out with my girlfriends and get drunk and act stupid and there's no positive return on that except bonding with my friends and de-stressing... but I don't do it every week where my family has to lose that much of my time and attention (and my career and my brain when I'm hungover for the whole next day!). He has an issue with self-control when it comes to things like this and it is worse with some games over others... and I'm a pretty understanding type of chick! But if I have to beg you to go to bed with me even one night a week and I have to force you to spend time with the kids on the weekend... that's a problem.

Raf1

I spend a few hours a week on video games, but I find it a waste of time. I only play when I need to let some stress off and I'm too tired to do anything more physical

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NikKay

Like everyone else, people act differently in the courting stage than they do in the comfortable relationship stage. Like I said at some point above, I don't have a problem with the activity in itself but I do have a problem with the amount of time devoted to it. I like to have threesomes but if my man only wanted to have sex when it was a threesome I might have an issue with that. Or... I don't mind that he does it as long as it's not ALL he does. And this is just me having standards for christ's sake. I'm not trying to be controlling. I don't expect him to find me attractive if I gain 50 pounds so why should I be expected to find him attractive if he's doing something I find just as much of a turn off?

If your wife gained 50 pounds and you no longer wanted to have sex with her because of it... would you just accept it or bring it up and look for advice and try to change it for the sake of your relationship/family?

96ukssob

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Nicky

My brother play's WoW like a mofo my self I play video or computer games maybe a couple hours / week.

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NikKay

How about I could be out at a bar and he wouldn't be able to play games because he'd have to deal with the kids and the household?

Pedro Pink Robot

If it bothers you so much, you should talk to him. I think it's the only advice I could give you

NikKay

Thanks.

We have talked about it and it's an issue being dealt with in therapy currently. I just like to get outside opinions from the real world too... keeps me grounded and helps me ensure I'm thinking through all sides of an issue.

_Richard_

to be frank.. my opinion of your husband, and i'm assuming the father of your children, is that he is lazy, cares nothing for you and the kids, and puts up with a hell of a lot of bs simply to play a lot of video games, (some of which are brand new)

is this correct in anyway?

Tom_PM

Expressing things in terms of how they make you feel is always going to be more enlightening than trying to be someone elses brain and trying to state to them what you think they are doing.

Say how it makes you feel when he sits there all day, rather than telling him that all he does is sit there all day.

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BlackCrayon

probably subconsciously avoiding some issue. i knew guys who played video games all of the time but i would imagine it should eventually wear off.

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Pleasurepays

Hit me up on Xbox for some COD Modern Warfare 2 action. I have a 1.45 k/d ratio and climbing.

MidgetTears!

NikKay

HAHA... that's the game! I'll pass along the info. :-P

MetaMan

I think you are probably just boring. i have never ignored a fun woman. if you are boring the guy would rather play games.

what do you bring to the table?

*awaits im a mother answer*

Agent 488

probably feels like he's in a prison with the wife and kids and plays to drown out the resentment that is life his slipping away.

once he snaps i guess the police will take it from there.

NikKay

What do I bring to the table?

1. I make good money. I'm good at my job and have a healthy career ahead of me. I have no desire to ever stay home and play housewife.

2. I am attractive, fun, and sexually open (and genuinely bisexual).

3. Everyone who meets me loves me so he gets the accolades of friends, family and co-workers who think he must be awesome to have snagged the likes of me.

4. I'm smart and witty and a good conversationalist.

5. I'm not materialistic. I hate to shop and refuse to spend more than $50 on a pair of shoes... and if I'm going to buy a pair of shoes they better damn well go with at least 1/4 of my outfits.

6. I'm funny and have a good sense of humor.

7. I'm quite well versed in all things sexual which makes for good entertaining conversation at parties.

8. I can hang with the boys so his friends always want to invite me out with them to poker, strip clubs, etc.

6. I'm loving, which makes me a good mother and an affectionate partner.

7. I'm tough and opinionated (which may be a negative to some but he likes being able to respect his partner).

8. I have that quality that tends to make people feel they are better off for having known me.

There are other smaller things like that I'm confident (but I think I covered that above) or that I know how to dress for the occasion... but you get the picture.

sobaka

Career, family, friends, and self-improvement - those are your priorities. His priorities may very well be to make enough money to have a place to live and play video games. Anyway, it sounds like he did not want family. Lots of men end up with a family not because they wanted to, but because of society expectations and/or because their gfs gradually nag them into marriage/children thing.

MetaMan

was he "boring" before you got married?

as said above alot of people get married for the wrong reasons. instead of going through a "lonely" period and find someone you genuinly match with people get tied down before they are afraid to be "alone". then they get married and realize they never really knew the person.

Agent 488

why were you attracted to him in the forst place? guy seems like a slob.

Slick

Us guys all need our free time, like someone else said, he could be spending all of his free time out at a bar. If ya think about it, video games are cheap entertainment, you buy a $60 game and there's many nights of entertainment.

I guess the biggest problem would be if you're asking him to go out and do things and he's turning you down to sit in front of the tv, then that's the problem.

I myself spend many hours on the computer every day and I game from time to time when I get a chance, but the second the wife asks me if I want to go shopping or go for lunch, I drop what I'm doing and go.